bodies of work: part three

i thought i wasn't ready to let go

but what hurts even more is holding

onto a love that wasn’t truly meant for you

so i went along and broke my own heart

instead of prolonging the premonition that

weighed heavily on my shoulders because

impending heartbreak is no better than mere

heartbreak as i cut the attachment before my

heart sinks even deeper into old wounds that

would do us no good in the long run anyway

"heartbreak, moving forward, longing"

feels like fraud

it doesn’t feel real

because no matter

how hard i attempt

to fill the void with

everything beyond you

and my own heart

i come back to myself

feeling emptier and

helpless for drowning

in distraction that

only has me choking

up at the end of

the night when

i think about

you the most

loving after you

post heartbreak hues

the color of heartbreak isn’t always a melancholy

shade of blue or a dreary lackluster color

the color of heartbreak is more of a rainbow

that comes to light after the rain has subsided,

the first smile that cracks between the clouds

there is that glow i hadn’t seen in forever,

smile is so vibrant it casts a ray of sunshine

where it was once dark and lifeless like those

still nights where i was convinced the color

of heartbreak was always blue, but i realized

the color of my heart was like a chameleon

adapting to the weather, like broken hearts

going through the seasons of not the color

blue, but the shades of healing hues

last goodbye

the paradox of our last goodbye was that i felt pain and ease

my chest tightened at the thought of never hearing you speak

but, through the evaporated tears, were we left with peace

i smiled knowing that you were still thinking of me

‘cause behind my eyes you appear in my dreams

so my heart asks me where have they gone?

and i respond, a place where they best belong

but my love stays in place despite the loss

we were two masterpieces, our best artworks hand drawn

forget me not, for you once smited me in awe

i hope you are doing well

i’d be lying if i said i still don’t think about you

you weigh heavy on my subconscious like rocks

on my shoulders as i once carried the leverage of

our one sided tragedy i thought was a love story

but in reality you and i were nothing more than

a superficial fairytale with the wrong ending or

perhaps the right ending because this was no

happily ever after with white dresses and roses

no, we were nothing close to that to my dismay